Sens at Land's End

Chris Phillips is excited to receive a present!

Today, we have gifts for two of my personal favourite Senators players, the #1 defensive pairing of Chris Phillips and Anton Volchenkov.

Chris Phillips

Phillips seems to be a genuinely good guy off the ice. We all know the story of how he and his sister cared for their parents as teenagers. Since he came to the NHL, he’s grown strong roots in the community in Ottawa: he’s a family man, married to a local girl, father of (at last count) three young children. He’s active in charities and is one of the longest-serving Sens as well as an alternate captain of the team. On the ice, he’s a rock solid team player and a comforting presence on the blueline. When I see Chris Phillips, I feel like no one is going to mess with the Sens, and everything’s going to be okay. In honour of his strength, stability, and general down-to-earthness, I thought it would be appropriate to get him an old-growth tree, so I went to Stanley Park and cut one down. Just kidding! I would never do such a thing. Instead, I will find a random tree and name it after him. This will be a largely symbolic gesture since I will likely be the only person to acknowledge the tree’s name, but I hope he’ll appreciate the thought.

Phillips has also been nicknamed the Big Rig. That is why I’ve decided to get him his very own semi and, to go along with it, a trucker hat, so he can drive his family around the nation’s capital in style. If I had cut down a tree for him, I could transport it cross country to Ottawa in his semi. But I have not.

Anton Volchenkov

Volchenkov pretty much epitomizes awesomeness. He’s so awesome that Chuck Norris, Jack Bauer, and Superman all wear Anton Volchenkov pyjamas. He’s totally fearless and seems to thrive on pain. His dedication during last year’s playoffs, when he wanted to come back into a game after taking a puck to the face even though his head was so swollen that they couldn’t get a helmet to fit him — you just can’t replace something like that. Volchenkov eagerly blocks shots that would have most of us down on the ground crying like babies. And then he gets back up. “I’ve had worse,” I imagine him saying, much like the Black Knight from Monty Python and the Holy Grail, which is why I thought the A-Train should have this awesome talking Black Knight plushie. Its limbs are removable, and when you take them off the Knight says things like “‘Tis but a scratch!” and “Just a flesh wound!” It is, in essence, a tiny Volchenkov with velcro-attached limbs and an English accent. I also spotted this “Give Blood, Play Hockey” shirt at Roots. I think it’s very him. Plus, it matches the new black jerseys.

Merry Christmas, Phillichenkov! You rule!

Shout Out to: Roy Mlakar

Perusing the Sun this morning, I happened to notice this little item:

Sun Media has learned that Senators president Roy Mlakar will propose to the NHL board of governors at their meeting tomorrow in Palm Beach, Fla., that the NHL look at a Nov. 15 drop-dead date for UFAs to sign or have to sit out the season. Mlakar confirmed he will table the item and has the backing of Ottawa GM Bryan Murray. “For planning purposes and to restrict bidding wars, it just makes sense,” said Mlakar. A league executive with another Eastern Conference team said he would back the idea as well, but says “it would be a tough change to make without approval from the NHLPA.”

I think this is a great idea and I’m happy to see the Sens being the ones to bring it up. Could their motivation possibly be a bit of anti-Ducks bitterness? If so, I approve.

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